Starting their fostering journey
Michael, 70, and his partner Robert, have been together for over 40 years. They began fostering 16 years ago with Orange Grove and haven’t looked back since. Michael said:
“I was so nervous when we made our initial call to Orange Grove - I almost put the phone down before the fostering advisor answered! I was worried that we might not be able to foster as a gay couple, but Orange Grove were really welcoming and made us both feel so comfortable.”
A connection like no other
The couple fostered two toddlers, Matthew and Daniel, who they went on to adopt 18 months later. Michael said:
“As a man, I’d always wondered, ‘how could you love somebody else’s child the way you would love your own?’ The answer? It’s very, very easy. We had no intention of ever becoming adoptive parents, but when our boys came to live with us, it was a connection like we’d never experienced before.”
“We were their first and only foster parents. When we were asked if we would adopt them, we weren’t quite sure if we were ready for such a huge life change. We had a couple’s holiday booked and used that opportunity to take some time to decide if adoption was the right route for us. On the very first day of our holiday, we both found ourselves in tears because we missed our boys so much! We knew then that it was the right decision.”
Fostering as a family
The boys are, now, all grown up and have flown the nest. Matthew, now 17, has just started his first job at a coffee shop, and Daniel, 18, has left the family home to start university. Michael and Robert have now returned to fostering. Michael said:
“We’ve done all types of fostering, from caring for toddlers to teenagers. More recently we’ve taken up parent and child fostering, where we welcome a new mum or dad into our home with their little one so that we can help support and guide them in caring for their child. You see a real transformation in these parents. Watching them move on to start a home with their child is an incredible feeling.”
“When parents come to stay with us, their children are usually very young newborns. Both Matthew and Daniel love babies, and we really do foster together as a family. The bond between the four of us is incredible.”
A better life
Michael shared some encouragement for anyone considering becoming a foster parent. He said:
“You can't say to a potential foster carer, ‘oh, everything is brilliant!’ because it's not. That being said, fostering has changed my life. I didn't believe that I could do this. I didn't believe that I could become a parent because I did it so late in life. Fostering has given me a new life, a brilliant life, where my partner and I have built a family and have had the chance to change other families’ lives. Knowing that the children and families we’ve helped are moving on to a better life because of our help is so rewarding.”
Could you foster?
If you’re interested in beginning your own fostering story, we’d love to hear from you. Get in touch with our friendly fostering advisors today by filing out our online enquiry form.
Interested in hearing more stories from real foster parents like Michael and Robert? Check out our catalogue of foster parent stories.
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